Why did the monk go to the doctor? He needed transcendental medication!

Why did the Pope carry a briefcase? To hold his Papal documents!

What do you call a group of Quakers on a ship? Oats and Prayers!

Why did the rabbi go to the basketball game? He heard it was a slam dunk service!

Why did the pastor go to the baseball game? To practice pitching the word of God!

Why did the nun start a band? She had some killer habits!

Why don't witches go to church? They already have too many coven meetings!

Why did the monk wear sandals? He wanted to walk in the footsteps of the Lord!

Why did the bishop go to the gym? To work on his cross fit!

What do you get when you cross a pastor and a dog? A preacher that barks up the right tree!

Why did the Dalai Lama go to the comedy club? He needed to laugh his way to enlightenment!

What do you call a nun who is a magician? Sister Abra-cadabra!

Why did the priest go to the football game? To quarterback some prayers!

What do you call a religious fish? A cod from the deep!

Why did the priest bring a map to church? To find his way to salvation and read Isaiah!

What do you call a group of singing priests? A choir-ical ensemble!

Why did the priest go to the bank? To make a holy deposit!

What is a priest's favorite kind of tea? Ecclesiastical grey!

Why did the nun bring a ladder to church? To get to the higher power!

What is a vampire's favorite type of religious music? Soul music!

Why did the Dalai Lama refuse to give his friend a dollar? Change must come from within!