What did one blade of grass say to the other? Nice knowing you, we'll be lawn friends.

Why did the tomato turn red? It was embarrassed.

How does a penguin fly? It doesn't, penguins can't fly.

I told my wife she should do squats to stay fit. That's a squat load for her to handle.

Why couldn't the bicycle find its balance? It was two-tired of trying.

How do you organize a space party? You planet, but don't expect to see any stars.

Why did the tomato turn pink? It caught the other tomatoes in the greenhouse making out.

I used to play the guitar by nose, but now I use my fingers like everyone else.

What's green and invisible? This joke because it doesn't make any sense.

I asked the chef if they had any recipes for surprise. They said, 'It's a secret.'

Why did the scarecrow win the talent show? He had the best straw performance.

What's the fastest game in the world? Hide-and-seek with the Flash.

I told my friend I had a great joke about time travel, but you didn't like it.

Why did the math book look angry? It had too many square roots to deal with.

Why did the tomato turn purple? It was feeling blue.

I asked my cat if they wanted to hear a joke, but they just meowed at me.

I tried to write a joke about construction, but I'm still building up to it.

Why did the tomato blush? It saw the salad dressing undressing.

Why did the skeleton hit the party by himself? He had no body to accompany him.

Why did the tomato wear sunscreen? It didn't want to turn into ketchup.

I asked my dad if he could put the cat out, and he said, 'Try the front door.'