How did the blonde shoot a bird? She threw it up in the air and missed.

What did the blonde do when she found out it was raining cats and dogs? She went outside with a pooper scooper.

Why did the blonde bring a pencil to the bar? To draw a straight line.

Why did the blonde take a ladder to the comedy club? She wanted to reach the punchline.

How did the blonde die while ice fishing? She fell through the ice and drowned in the fish tank.

What did the blonde do when she found out she was pregnant? She went to the library to learn how babies are made.

How did the blonde break her leg playing soccer? She tripped over a crack in the bench.

Why did the blonde bring a chainsaw to the cooking class? She heard they were going to chop vegetables.

How did the blonde break her nose while skydiving? She tried to catch the air.

Why did the blonde sit on the clock during her exam? She wanted to pass the time.

What did the blonde do when she found out she was allergic to nuts? She moved to a different forest.

How did the blonde die at the baseball game? She drowned in the wave.

Why did the blonde bring a hammer to the dance party? She heard they were going to rock the night away.

How did the blonde die while watering her plants? She got tangled in the hose and drowned.

What did the blonde do when she heard someone was stealing her jokes? She called the pun-lice.

How did the blonde break her leg while milking a cow? The cow kicked the bucket.

What did the blonde do when she heard someone was selling mirrors? She bought one to see if she could reflect on her problems.

Why did the blonde take a pencil to the cooking show? To write down the recipe for disaster.

What did the blonde do when she heard it was Halloween? She went to the grocery store to buy a pumpkin.

Why did the blonde bring a pencil to the exam? To draw her conclusions.

Why did the blonde think she could park her car in the handicap spot? Because she thought it meant she could do a handstand.