Did you hear about the blonde skydiver? She missed the earth.

What do you call a blonde with dark roots? Artificial intelligence.

Why did the blonde go to the post office? She heard she could get a hands-free set for her cell phone.

What do you call a blonde with a brain? A labrador retriever.

What did the blonde do when she couldn't find her phone? She dialed 9-1-1.

How did the blonde try to cool down her laptop? She put it in the freezer.

What did the blonde say when asked what's on TV tonight? Dust.

How did the blonde try to start a lawn mower? She told it to 'turn over'.

Why did the blonde bring a key to the bakery? To check if the bread was 'key' lime pie.

What did the blonde do when she saw the 'Don't Walk' sign? She turned around and went home.

Why did the blonde bring a hairdryer to the beach? To blow away the waves.

How did the blonde try to catch the fog? She chased it.

What did the blonde say when asked if she wanted a bag for her groceries? 'No, I'll just carry them'

How did the blonde try to fix her flat tire? She put more air in the gas tank.

Why did the blonde bring a scale to the party? To weigh her options.

What did the blonde say when asked to solve a math problem? 'I have enough problems of my own.'

Why did the blonde bring a helmet to the concert? In case she hit a high note.

How did the blonde try to make a microwave meal? She put it in the oven for 30 seconds.

Why did the blonde bring a map to the park? In case she got lost on the swings.

What did the blonde do when she saw 'No Parking' sign? She parked anyways and said 'I can't read.'

Why did the blonde bring a flashlight to the bar? To look for the spotlight.