Why did the blonde bring a ladder to the shopping mall? She heard the prices were through the roof.

What did the blonde do when she found out she was dyslexic? She joined AA.

What did the blonde do when she heard that 2% of car accidents are caused by texting? She stopped texting and started calling instead.

Why did the blonde bring a baseball bat to the bar? To hit on someone.

How do you confuse a blonde with a flashlight? Tell her it's a laser beam.

What did the blonde say when she found out she was allergic to peanuts? 'I guess I'll never be peanut butter and jelly.'

Why did the blonde bring a ruler to the bar? To measure the drinks.

What did the blonde do when she heard it was going to be cold? She went and put on another sweater.

Why did the blonde sneak the ladder into the bar? She heard it was a step up from the rest.

What do you call a blonde with brunette roots? Artificial intelligence.

Why did the blonde bring a gun to the bar? She heard it was a shot bar.

Why did the blonde become a surgeon? She heard they had a lot of patients.

What do you call a blonde with pig tails? A microphone.

Why did the blonde bake a chicken on the keyboard? She wanted it to have all 12 drumsticks.

Why did the blonde go to the airport and walk around aimlessly? She heard it was a terminal illness.

What did the blonde say when asked if she believed in the Loch Ness monster? 'Is that the one with the long neck and the Scottish accent?'.

Why did the blonde wear a helmet to the bar? She heard shots were being fired all night.

What did the blonde say when she couldn't fit the puzzle pieces together? 'Looks like I'm missing a piece of the picture!'

Why did the blonde bring a hairdryer to the beach? She heard they needed a hot shot.

How did the blonde break her leg at the concert? She fell off the scale when she tried to measure her weight during the show.

Why did the blonde bring a chainsaw to the garden? She heard it was time for a trim.