Why did the blonde take a ruler to the beach? To measure the tide!

Why did the blonde bring a shovel to the party? She heard they were serving dirt cake!

Why did the blonde bring a backpack full of rocks to the hiking trip? In case she wanted to rock climb!

How did the blonde break her thumb while making a sandwich? She mistook the knife for a thumbtack.

Why did the blonde stare at the can of soup? It said 'Open carefully, contents hot'.

What did the blonde say when she saw a bowl of alphabet soup? 'Oh no, now I have to spell-check my meal!'

Why did the blonde bring a flashlight to the bar? She heard it was lit.

How did the blonde break her toe while gardening? She stubbed it on a thought.

Why did the blonde stare at the carton of milk? It said 'Don't cry over spilled milk'.

Why did the blonde get excited about a jigsaw puzzle with 10 pieces? It said '2-4 years'.

What did the blonde say when she saw a blinking stop sign? 'Is it broken or just winking at me?'

Why did the blonde stare at the calendar for hours? She was waiting for the date to change.

How does a blonde part their hair? With a car key.

What do a blonde and an instant lottery ticket have in common? All you have to do is scratch the box to win.

Why don't blondes need vacuums? They just sweep the thought's away.

How do you know a blonde has been using your car? The rearview mirror is filled with selfies.

Why did the blonde bring a bell to the bar? In case she needed to ring for service.

How do you confuse a blonde? Put her in front of a revolving door and tell her to rotate.

Why did the blonde wear a helmet to the bar? Because she heard it was a head banging good time.

How do you know a blonde has been using your email? You find drafts addressed to 'Dear Netflix'.

What did the blonde do when she finished a jigsaw puzzle in 6 months? She asked for a medal.