Jokes about morbid or controversial topics; not for everyone.
Why did the ghost become an Uber driver? He heard it was a 'grave' opportunity.
I asked my wife if she would still love me if I turned into a monster. She said, 'Don't worry, you're already one.'
Why did the psychic become a baker? She heard they have a lot of 'fortune' cookies.
Why are zombies so good at math? They can 'count' on their fingers.
My wife told me I was too obsessed with the afterlife. I told her, 'Death is the only thing certain in this relationship.'
Why did the werewolf become an accountant? He wanted to 'balance' his books.
Why did the zombie become a painter? He heard his work was 'dead' on.
Why don't ghosts like shopping malls? They're too full of 'spirits'.
Why did the vampire come back from the dead? He wanted to 'fang' you for the memories.
Why don't werewolves ever get invited to parties? They always have a 'howling' good time.
My wife told me she's always had a 'killer' sense of humor. I said, 'Don't bury us with it yet.'
Why did the undertaker go to the art gallery? He heard they had some 'dead' pieces on display.
Why was the zombie always picked first for sports teams? He had a real 'dead' eye for the goal.
Why was the witch always single? She kept putting love potions in 'couples' drinks.
Why don't zombies ever attend concerts? They don't 'band' together very well.
I asked the werewolf if he wanted to hang out. He said, 'I can't. I'm 'un-leashed'.
Why did the ghost become a dermatologist? He heard they had great 'spook'tacular treatments.
Why did the zombie become a doctor? He wanted to 'raise' the dead.
Why don't necrophiliacs ever complain about the cold? They're used to 'dead' bodies.
My wife told me I was 'dead' right about everything. I said, 'That's just the 'grave' situation.'
Why was the vampire good at baseball? He could always 'bat' his way through the competition.