I'm reading a book on modern art – it's quite abstract.

I asked my oven to tell me a joke – it said it wasn't a comedian, just a grill.

I'm trying to organize a wrestling match, but it's a pinned down problem.

I told my wife she should try comedy improv – she said she'll think on her feet.

I asked my calculator for a joke – it said it wasn't programmed for humor.

I told my wife she should try karate – she said she'll kick right in.

I'm trying to organize a belt-making competition, but it's a waist of time.

I asked my math teacher if I should study the geometry – he said to circle back later.

I asked my cat for a pun – he refused, saying it was beneath him.

I'm trying to organize a fishing tournament, but it's quite a reel challenge.

I told my wife she should try skydiving – she said she'll fall for it.

I asked my computer for a joke – it said, 'You make me compute with laughter.'

I'm trying to organize a baking contest, but it's a batter of skill.

I tried to write a song about tortillas, but it was more of a rap.

Why did the scarecrow win a medal? Because he was outstanding in his straw.

I used to be a marathon runner, but now I can't even run a mile.

I asked the gym trainer if he could help me do the splits – he told me to split from the gym.

My cat is a terrible comedian – she always has meow fail.

I wanted to be a comedian, but I couldn't stand the punchlines.

I went to the zoo and saw a baguette in a cage – turns out it was bread in captivity.

I tried to write a joke about Monty Python, but it was too silly.