I'm writing a book on how to organize a space party. Do you think it will be a hit?

My girlfriend told me to stop playing Pokemon as it was childish... I started thrashing about and roared, 'You don't have enough badges to train me!'

I told my computer I needed a break, now there's a cup holder that pops out.

I'm writing a book on hurricanes and tornados... it’s a whirlwind of emotions.

Did you hear about the skeleton that threw a party? It was humerus.

Did you hear about the painter who was hospitalized? He didn't know his limits.

Why can't you tell secrets at a farm? Because the potatoes have eyes and the corn has ears.

Why did the bacteria join social media? It wanted to connect.

Did you hear about the astronaut who stepped on chewing gum? He got stuck in orbit.

What do you call a fly buzzing inside a computer? A screen saver.

Why do golfers wear two pairs of pants? In case they get a hole in one.

Why was the volcano upset? It was just blowing off steam.

What level do you unlock a piano at? A-Sharp.

I used to be a baker, but I ran out of dough.

I'm friends with all the letters of the alphabet, you could say we're BFFs.

Why don't mathematicians like to fight? They always add up to trouble.

My favorite time on the clock is 6:30, hands down.

I told my wife she should be a mathematician, she multiplied my problems.

I used to be a baker but it just wasn't my loaf.

I told my wife she should embrace her mistakes, she hugged me like a vice.

I told my friend a chemistry joke, there was no reaction.