Why did the iPhone break up with the computer? It found a better connection.

Why did the belt arrest the pants? For holding up a pair of jeans.

Why don't crabs share? Because they're shellfish.

Why did the man break up with his refrigerator? He felt it was too cold.

Why don't fish play basketball? They're afraid of the net.

What do you call a pair of socks in love? Sole mates.

Why did the candle break up with the flashlight? It couldn't handle the spotlight.

Why did the statistics professor break up with the calculus teacher? They just didn't add up.

Why did the geologist break up with the geography teacher? There were too many faults in their relationship.

Why did the volleyball player break up with the soccer player? They were having a ball, but it didn't kick off.

Why did the man propose in a restaurant? He wanted to put a ring on it.

Why did the musician break up with the chef? They couldn't find the perfect beat.

Why did the nervous relationship go to couples therapy? To work on their bond.

Why did the statistician break up with the geologist? There were too many problems in their relationship.

What did one plate say to the other plate? Dinner is on me, but the relationship is over.

Why did the belt break up with the pants? They were holding him back, just like this relationship is holding me back.

Why did the boy bring a ladder to his date? He heard girls like guys who are high on the social ladder.

Why did the skeleton go on a date by himself? He didn't have the guts to ask anyone out.

My husband is like a box of chocolates - a little nuts, but always sweet.

Why did the girl break up with the tennis player? Love meant nothing to him.

I started dating a baker because they make great dates.