Why don't scientists trust religious texts? Because they always take everything on faith.

What kind of car does the Pope drive? A Fiat-of-the-faith.

Why did the ghosts go to church? To pray for a little ghoul intervention.

What kind of car do angels drive? A Halo.

Why don't owls go to church? They prefer to worship in the owl-night.

Why did the yogi become a priest? He found enlightenment in the pulpit.

Why did the scarecrow become a monk? He was outstanding in his field of prayer.

How does a priest stay warm in the winter? He lights a little incense.

Why was the belt so pious? It held up pants without sinching too tight.

What do you get when you cross a church with a burger joint? Holy cow!

Why did the baker go to church? He kneaded some prayer.

What do you call a baby sheep in a church? A little lamb of God.

How did the Bible study group keep warm? They gathered around the fire and brimstone.

Why did the vampire convert to Christianity? He heard they had a lot of cross-training.

Why did the monk meditate in the garden? He wanted to find inner peas.

I told a joke about the Ark of the Covenant, but it was too heavy for anyone to get it.

Why did the scarecrow receive an award? Because he was outstanding in his field.

Why did the pastor bring a ladder to the sermon? He wanted to preach on a higher level.

Why did the Dalai Lama go to the bakery? To find his inner bun.

What do you call a nun who is into martial arts? A nun-chuck.

Why did the priest start a detective agency? He had a calling for solving mysteries.