How do you make a holy sandwich? With prayer and a little bit of blessings.

Why did the atheist carry a map? In case he finds religion.

What's a priest's favorite kind of drink? A Virgin mojito.

Why don't rabbis play hide and seek? Because good hiding spots are 'kosher'.

What did the Buddhist say when he walked into the pizza parlor? 'Make me one with everything.'

Why did the nun bring a ladder to church? To help her reach salvation.

How does a vampire pray before meals? 'Let us sink our fangs into this food.'

Why did the pastor get a haircut? He wanted to make sure his 'holy crown' looked good.

Why did the chicken join a church choir? He had a lot of peck-talent.

What do you get when you cross a kangaroo and a priest? A leap of faith.

Why was the belt arrested? For holding up pants in a no-belt zone.

How does the Pope like his pizza? Holy-moly with extra cheese.

Why did the pastor carry a watch? He wanted to work overtime.

Why did the vampire become a priest? He wanted to avoid garlic.

How do you get holy water? Boil the Hell out of it.

Sunday school teacher: Why was Jonah a bad company? Student: Because he always left people with a sinking feeling!

What did the atheist say to the religious ducks? You quack me up.

Why did the chicken join the church choir? It had a good eggs-perience in singing.

What do you call a group of righteous cows? Holy cow-munion.

Why did the skeleton go to church? To repent for its bonely sins.

How do you know if a church is haunted? It's always exorcising its demons.