Why do monks live in monasteries? Because they need some monk-ee business.

Why was the bible tired? It had so many long chapters to rest.

What does a religious kangaroo do? Goes to mass-hopping service.

Why was the atheist kicked out of the chess tournament? Because he kept saying 'bishop' doesn't exist.

How did Noah manage to keep all the animals calm on the ark? He organized a 'pray-er' group.

Why did the robot join the church choir? It had extraordinary faith in technology.

What was Jesus' favorite type of car? A Christ-ler.

What do you call a fish with a religious upbringing? A holy mackerel.

Why did the ghost go to church? To get some holy spirit.

What do you call a bear in church? A praying manti-bear.

Why did the potato go to church? It needed some hash-brownie points.

What's the best type of dance for a religious person? The Psalm shuffle.

How did the zombie evangelist spread the good word? Through dead-ication.

Why did the teacher go to church on Sunday? To pray for better grades.

Why did the skeleton go to the church? Because he had nobody to go with him.

Why do cows make bad monks? They lack the udder devotion.

Why did the pastor carry a ladder to work? To reach new heights in his preaching.

How does Santa Claus stay grounded in his faith? He goes to church every ho-ho-holy day.

Why did the nun go to the baseball game? To catch some faith-flys.

Why did the skeleton go to church? Because he had a lot of bones to pick with the pastor.

What type of car did Jesus drive? A Christ-ler.