Why do monks always carry umbrellas? In case of a Hail Mary.

Why did the scarecrow win an award at the religious harvest festival? Because he was outstanding in his field.

Why did the priest go to therapy? He had too many repressed altars.

Why did the computer go to church? To fix its motherboard.

What do you call a group of praying mantises? Preying mantises.

Why did the priest always carry a watch during sermons? To make sure his points were well-timed.

What do you call a nun who walks into a bar? A sister Act.

Why did the music teacher go to the church? To find the church choir.

What do you call a group of singing potatoes? A hymn-spud.

How does the Pope communicate with his followers? He pops up on their feed.

Why did the pastor always carry a tissue? In case he had a bless-you moment.

Why did the skeleton go to the church? He heard they had body of Christ.

How does the Virgin Mary hold up her dress? With an amen-dment.

Why did the scarecrow become a religious leader? He was outstanding in his field.

What did the preacher say to the credit card? Let us pray.

Why couldn't the leopard change his religion? He couldn't convert his spots.

Why did the math book look to religion for answers? It needed some divine solutions.

Why did the vegetable start going to church? It needed some preachy greens.

What did the spiritual rock say to the geologist? Pray tell, what are you digging for?

Why was the belt sent to jail? It held up a pair of pants.

Why don’t scientists trust atoms anymore? Because they make up everything.