What do you get when you cross a snowman and a preacher? Cold sermons.

Why was the football coach a good pastor? He knew how to draw up the right plays.

Why did the turkey join the church? To spread the good gravy.

Why don't chefs like playing hide and seek with the nun? Good habits are hard to find.

Why did the lemon go to church? To get some lemon-aid.

Why do angels always fly so high? Because they can't stand sinners.

Why did the grape go to church? To raisin' the roof.

What do you call a holy grilled cheese sandwich? Cheesus crust.

Why was the music teacher sent to detention? He couldn't keep his hymns to himself.

How does a priest organize his emails? He uses the Holy Ctrl.

What do you call a can opener that doesn't work? A Catholic.

Why did the choir group go to the seafood restaurant? They heard it was a religious experience.

Why was the baker always calm? He knew how to roll with the dough.

Why don't monks use email? They believe in more direct communication.

Why did the golfer go to the church? He heard it had a great swing.

What do you call an athlete who never gives up? A true believer.

Why was the math book jealous of the Bible? It had too many denominations.

Why did the pastor go to art school? He wanted to learn how to draw closer to God.

What is a priest's favorite type of humor? Heavenly puns.

Why did the atheist throw a stick of dynamite into the church? He wanted to blow the faith right out of it.

Why did the tomato break up with the corn? It couldn't find the right husk.