What is a tree's least favorite month? Sep-timber!

What did the clown say when he jumped out of the closet? Supplies!

Why did the golf.ter bring two pairs of pants? In case he got a hole in one!

Why did the chicken join a comedy club? To get to the other side of funny!

What do you call a cow with a twitch? Beef jerky!

Why did the cookie break up with the milk? It couldn't handle the dunking anymore!

What do you call a belt made out of dollar bills? A waste of money!

Why did the donut go to the dentist? To get a sugar coating!

What do you call a snowman in the summer? A puddle!

Why couldn't the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired!

Why did the belt go to prison? It was holding up a pair of pants!

Why can't you give Elsa a balloon? She will let it go!

What did one plate say to the other plate? Dinner's on me tonight!

Why did the picture go to jail? It was framed!

Why did the scientist install a knocker on his door? He wanted to win the No-bell prize!

Why do trees seem suspicious on sunny days? They look shady!

Why did the hipster burn his mouth on pizza? He ate it before it was cool!

Why did the ocean break up with the shore? It was getting too shallow!

Why was the math book crying? Too many problems!

I couldn't figure out why the baseball kept getting larger. Then it hit me!

I swallowed some food coloring and now I feel like I've dyed a little inside.