Why did the golfer bring an extra pair of shoes to the tee? In case he got a hole in one!

Why did the baseball coach go to jail? Because he stole all the bases!

How did the octopus beat the shark in a fight? It was well-armed!

Why did the bicycle never stay upright? It had a kickstand complex!

Who stole the soap? The robber ducky!

How do you pick up a penguin? With an icebreaker!

Why did the robot go on a diet? It had a byte too much!

How do you find a mouse with no tail? Sneak up behind it and squeak really quietly!

Why couldn't the pencil shoot straight? It was too drawn out!

How do you make a lemon drop? Just let it fall!

Why did the computer go to the doctor? It had a slipped disk!

How do you prevent a summer cold? Catch it in winter!

What did the big flower say to the small flower? What's up, bud?

What did the ocean say to the sailboat? Nothing, it just waved!

How do trees access the internet? They log in!

Where do snowmen keep their money? In a snow bank!

Why did the nurse always carry a red pen? In case they needed to draw blood!

Why do bicycles fall over? Because they're two-wheelie!

Why did the scarecrow go to the dance? Because he was outstanding in his field!

Why was the stadium so cool? It had a lot of fans!

Why did the golfer carry two shirts? In case he got a hole in one!