Yo mama is so short, she can swing on a noodle.

Yo mama is so clumsy, she tried to play the alphabet on a guitar.

Yo mama is so slow, it took her an hour to make minute rice.

Yo mama is so lazy, she thinks a balanced meal is a cookie in each hand.

Yo mama is so dirty, she brings mold to the shower.

Yo mama is so lazy, she doesn't chase the mailman, she hires him to come closer.

Yo mama is so stinky, the skunks avoid her.

Yo mama is so lazy, she buys her milk in powder form to save on cow hiring costs.

Yo mama is so short, she hang-glides on a Dorito.

Yo mama is so lazy, she has a solar-powered TV.

Yo mama is so lazy, she sticks her nose out the window to get some fresh air.

Yo mama is so old, she owes Jesus a nickel.

Yo mama is so mean, she salted the sidewalk to make sure nobody slipped on her tears.

Yo mama is so dumb, she took a spoon to the Super Bowl.

Yo mama is so fat, she wears a watch on each arm to keep track of both time zones.

Yo mama is so cheap, she made a Facebook account just to use the free WiFi.

Yo mama is so clumsy, she trips over a wireless network.

Yo mama is so ugly, the text 'Do not distribute' is stamped on her forehead.

Yo mama is so lazy, she doesn't sweat, she evaporates.

Yo mama is so cheap, she walked past a bathroom and took a rain check.

Yo mama is so clumsy, she walked into a room and coined the term 'hit and run'.