Yo mama is so skinny, she uses toothpicks as ski poles.

Yo mama is so uncoordinated, she trips over the cordless phone.

Yo mama is so uncoordinated, she got lost in a revolving door.

Yo mama is so fat, when she goes on a diet, the stock market drops.

Yo mama is so dumb, she thought Instagram was a weight-loss program.

Yo mama is so lazy, she has a glass eye with a 'Do Not Disturb' sign on it.

Yo mama is so uncoordinated, she thought fast food was hitting the speed limit.

Yo mama is so lazy, she puts her phone on speaker to use FaceTime.

Yo mama is so uncoordinated, she trips over her own shoelaces even when she's barefoot.

Yo mama is so dumb, she got locked in a mattress store and slept on the floor.

Yo mama is so dumb, she thought grape nuts was an STD.

Yo mama is so lazy, she has a housekeeper to brush her teeth.

Yo mama is so lazy, she got fired from the unemployment office for turning down too many jobs.

Yo mama is so cheap, when she goes to the store, she licks other people's fingers to save money on the Doritos.

Yo mama is so old, when she went to high school, history class was called current events.

Yo mama is so lazy, she only changes the channel when the batteries in the remote wear out.

Yo mama is so cheap, she takes mini cupcakes to potlucks.

Yo mama is so fat, she has more chins than a Chinese phonebook.

Yo mama is so ugly, when she tried to take a selfie, the camera cracked.

Yo mama is so cheap, when I asked for her sign, she gave me a dollar.

Yo mama is so short, she poses for keychain photos.