Yo mama is so lazy, she thinks a two-hour movie is a workout.

Yo mama is so hairy, she entered a beard competition... and won.

Yo mama is so lazy, she brought a ladder to a spelling bee.

Yo mama is so poor, she waves around a peanut and calls it a bank account.

Yo mama is so old, when I asked her what's her zodiac sign, she said 'dinosaur'.

Yo mama is so slow, she uses a calendar to time her microwave popcorn.

Yo mama is so hairy, when she auditioned for a shampoo commercial, they hired her as the before model.

Yo mama is so poor, she takes the trash in for entertainment.

Yo mama is so clumsy, when she plays soccer, she scores in the wrong goal.

Yo mama is so hairy, when she gives you a hug, you get a rug burn.

Yo mama is so hairy, the only time she shaves is when she goes to the zoo.

Yo mama is so poor, she hangs up plates for Christmas decorations.

Yo mama is so lazy, she has a personalized license plate that says 'LYGN ON COUCH'.

Yo mama is so cheap, she waves around a candy wrapper and calls it a scholarship.

Yo mama is so slow, she's the reason why the sloth crosses the road.

Yo mama is so thin, she uses spaghetti as a hula hoop.

Yo mama is so stupid, she tripped over a wireless network.

Yo mama is so cringy, when she dances, it looks like she's trying to iron a shirt with her feet.

Yo mama is so small, she poses for Lego sets.

Yo mama is so dirty, she makes a rubbish dump look clean.

Yo mama is so pale, her shadow blends in with snow.