Yo mama is so rude, she walks into a gift shop and buys nothing.

Yo mama is so poor, she hangs around ATMs to watch the balance go down.

Yo mama is so lazy, she doesn't sweat, she's permanently dewy.

Yo mama is so cheap, she hangs around cemeteries for free snacks.

Yo mama is so lazy, she tries to break a sweat by watching the Food Network.

Yo mama is so poor, she couldn't afford to pay attention even if it was on sale.

Yo mama is so poor, when she walked by the TV, you missed a season of your favorite show.

Yo mama is so lazy, when she went to the beach, she crashed into the shore.

Yo mama is so dirty, when she does the dishes, the soap walks away.

Yo mama is so old, when she went to the dentists, they found some of her baby teeth.

Yo mama is so hairy, she got a trim and Bigfoot made a coat out of it.

Yo mama is so fat, she accidentally ate her shadow.

Yo mama is so dumb, she stared at the juice carton for hours because it said 'concentrate'.

Yo mama is so clumsy, she couldn't even hit water if she fell out of a boat.

Yo mama is so old, she has a picture of Moses in her high school yearbook.

Yo mama is so clumsy, she thought a quarterback was a library patron.

Yo mama is so lazy, she doesn't even check the mail, she waits for the postman to walk it to her.

Yo mama is so old, when she went to the museum, she told them to put her on display.

Yo mama is so fat, when she jumps in the ocean, it looks like the ocean is jumping.

Yo mama is so lazy, she doesn't sweat, she shimmers.

Yo mama is so hairy, she has to braid her leg hair.