What did the grape say to the avocado? 'You're the guac to my roll.'

Why did the woman bring a map on her date? In case things didn't go in the right direction.

I told my boyfriend he should try skydiving. He said, 'Why jump out of a perfectly good relationship?'

Why don't skeletons go on dates? Because they have no-body to go with.

I asked my wife if she wanted to go to a movie. She said, 'I already saw it with my boyfriend.'

Why did the woman break up with the banker? He was always making deposits but never any withdrawals.

I told my girlfriend she should do more weightlifting. She said, 'I already lift you up emotionally.'

Why did the woman break up with the gardener? He was always leafing her.

I asked my wife if she wanted to go for a run. She said, 'I'm running low on excuses.'

Why did the man propose at the beach? He wanted to make a sand commitment.

Why did the woman break up with the musician? He couldn't handle a relationship on the right note.

I told my boyfriend he should try hiking. He said, 'I'm already climbing mountains to be with you.'

Why did the man bring a flashlight on his date? Because love is blind!

I told my wife she should do more cardio. She said, 'I'm seeing someone else.'

My girlfriend told me she needed more space. So I locked her outside.

Why did the man break up with his tailor? Their relationship was unraveling.

I told my husband he should do more yoga. He said, 'Nah, I'm already bending over backwards for you.'

Why did the man propose with a diamond ring? He wanted to put a ring on it.

Why did the man bring a map on his date? In case things don't go in the right direction.

I told my girlfriend she should do yoga to find inner peace. She said, 'Namaste away from me.'

Why did the man break up with his internet service provider? They just weren't connecting anymore.