Why did the couple break up at the fancy restaurant? It was a case of foie gras, foie bye-bye.

My boyfriend said he wanted to be more spontaneous. So I surprised him by moving out.

Why did the ghost go to couples therapy? He had too many unresolved issues.

I asked my wife where she wanted to go for our anniversary. She said, 'Somewhere I haven't been before.' So I suggested the kitchen.

Why did the man bring a map on his date? He heard love is a journey, not a destination.

My girlfriend said she wanted me to be more spontaneous. So I bought her flowers. Just not on any special occasion.

My wife said she wanted to be treated like a princess for her birthday. So I took her on a royal shopping spree – we maxed out three credit cards.

My girlfriend said she wanted me to be more protective. Now I have a restraining order.

Did you hear about the mathematician who broke up with his girlfriend? He couldn't handle her multiplying problems.

Why don't scientists trust atoms when they form relationships? Because they make up everything.

Why did the pillow break up with the blanket? It couldn't handle the covers.

Why did the couple go to therapy? Because their relationship was on the rocks.

Why did the man bring a ladder to his first date? He heard it was a step in the right direction.

Did you hear about the two antennas who got married? The wedding wasn't much, but the reception was excellent.

My wife says I only have two faults - I don't listen and something else.

Why did the man break up with his internet girlfriend? It just wasn't a stable connection.

What did the painter say to his wife? 'I love you with all my art.'

Why did the man bring a pencil to his first date? He heard it was a good way to draw someone in.

Why did the man propose at the gym? He wanted to take his relationship to the next level.

Why did the woman bring a watch on her date? She wanted to keep track of the relationship timeline.

What do you call an engagement ring at the bottom of the ocean? A promise from the deep.