Where do spiritual cows go on vacation? Mooslim countries.

Why don't pastors ever play hide and seek? Because good seekers are hard to find.

Why did the mummy join the church choir? To wrap its head around the hymns.

What do you call a priest in a snowstorm? A chilly padre.

Why did the zombie go to church? To raise spirits.

Why don't demons go to church? They're afraid of the cross-examination.

How did the apple get closer to God? It prayed daily.

What's a vampire's favorite part of the Bible? The book of 'Vampires and Virtue'.

Why do witches make terrible preachers? Their spells often backfire.

What kind of car does a witch drive? A broomstick.

Why did the skeleton become a monk? He found inner peace.

What's a ghost's favorite Bible passage? 'Boo-ke of Revelation'.

Why did the chicken say 'amen' after crossing the road? It finally made it to the other side.

What do you call a group of singers who are also priests? A choirboy band.

Why don't skeletons ever go to church? They don't have the stomach for it.

Why couldn't the sailor pray in the church? Because he kept hitting the high Cs.

What's a religious person's favorite dessert? Angel food cake.

Why did Noah only have a limited number of animals on the ark? He couldn't find another pair of good-looking zebras.

What's the best way to talk to a ghost? By spiritual medium.

Why did the vampire join the church choir? He wanted to learn how to harmonize.

Why did the pilgrim's pants keep falling down? They were holy.