Yo mama is so hairy, she got a haircut and the salon ran out of clippers.

Yo mama is so greasy, when she sits on a bench, she slides off.

Yo mama is so dirty, she plants potatoes under her bed and harvests french fries.

Yo mama is so hairy, when she auditions for Planet of the Apes, they give her the starring role.

Yo mama is so stupid, she brings a ladder to an escalator.

Yo mama is so slow, she listens to audio books on mute.

Yo mama is so greasy, when she goes to KFC, she slips into the back kitchen.

Yo mama is so lazy, she doesn't sweat, she rusts.

Yo mama is so old, she used to change Abraham Lincoln's diapers.

Yo mama is so lazy, she's on a sedentary bike and still takes breaks.

Yo mama is so stupid, she asked me to write her a receipt for a free sample at the store.

Yo mama is so lazy, when she takes a nap, even her dreams have a 'Snooze' button.

Yo mama is so short, when she drove a Lamborghini, she couldn't see over the steering wheel.

Yo mama is so ugly, when she went to a photo booth, it said 'Camera not found.'

Yo mama is so old, when she went to a museum, the fossils started dancing.

Yo mama is so lazy, when she decided to exercise, she went to the drive-thru.

Yo mama is so greasy, when she went to the beach, all the oil rigs in the ocean closed down.

Yo mama is so greasy, when she walks by a bakery, they call out 'Oil change!'

Yo mama is so old, when she farts, she sets off the dust alarm.

Yo mama is so lazy, when she went to the gym, she asked for a membership just to sit in the sauna.

Yo mama is so greasy, when she went to get a facial, they had to use degreaser.