Yo mama is so slow, she couldn't catch a cold if she tried.

Yo mama is so clumsy, she puts her shoes on the wrong feet and they still fit.

Yo mama is so greasy, she makes the floor slippery by just standing on it.

Yo mama is so skinny, she uses a rubber band as a belt.

Yo mama is so poor, she dances at weddings for the catering.

Yo mama is so slow, she went to a speed dating event and is still there.

Yo mama is so clumsy, she can trip over a wireless mouse.

Yo mama is so greasy, when she uses a touchscreen, it becomes a fingerprint scanner.

Yo mama is so wrinkled, when she goes to the beach, kids try to bury her.

Yo mama is so cheap, she takes toilet paper from public restrooms.

Yo mama is so mean, when she plays Candy Crush, she eats the candy.

Yo mama is so lazy, she thought a flashlight was a gym membership.

Yo mama is so tall, she makes Shaquille O'Neal look short.

Yo mama is so poor, when I asked her where the bathroom is, she asked if I had 50 cents.

Yo mama is so lazy, she doesn't toast her bread, she microwaves it.

Yo mama is so poor, she waves around a food stamp yelling 'WOOOOO!'.

Yo mama is so old, she owes Moses a dollar.

Yo mama is so lazy, when she came to visit, I had to hold the door for her.

Yo mama is so small, she does pull-ups on a cheerio.

Yo mama is so dirty, even a mud bath wouldn't help.

Yo mama is so clumsy, she can trip over a wireless phone.