Yo mama is so lazy, when she gets up in the morning, the sun has already set.

Yo mama is so fat, when she dives into a pool, NASA detects new gravitational waves.

Yo mama is so lazy, when I told her to act her age, she died.

Yo mama is so fat, when she hauls ass, she has to make two trips.

Yo mama is so lazy, when she goes to the beach, no one can tell if she's in a bikini or a burka.

Yo mama is so fat, when she takes a selfie, the camera is forced to do a panoramic shot.

Yo mama is so lazy, she took a nap to look busy.

Yo mama is so old, when she plays hide and seek, nobody bothers to look for her.

Yo mama is so lazy, she married your dad just to hire a moving company.

Yo mama is so tiny, she uses a pickle as a baseball bat.

Yo mama is so hairy, when she got a pixie cut, people thought she was a werewolf.

Yo mama is so ugly, the government issued a 'Warning: Restricted Area' sign whenever she walked by.

Yo mama is so dumb, she put a battery in her ear and thought she was listening to hip-hop.

Yo mama is so poor, she panhandles at the dollar store.

Yo mama is so short, she could hang glide under a coffee table.

Yo mama is so ugly, her portraits come with free blindness insurance.

Yo mama is so clumsy, when she tried to jump to conclusions, she tripped and fell.

Yo mama is so loud, when she whispers, the neighbors shout, 'We can hear you!'

Yo mama is so clumsy, when she ran for the bus, she missed.

Yo mama is so lazy, she's a remote control for the remote control.

Yo mama is so lazy, when she wakes up, she decides to go back to bed for a nap.