Yo mama is so old, when she went to the museum, they invited her to give a tour.

Yo mama is so dirty, the trash takes itself out when she walks by.

Yo mama is so short, when she goes to the zoo, she gets free admission as an exhibit.

Yo mama is so slow, it took her two weeks to watch 60 Minutes.

Yo mama is so slow, it takes her a month to watch 60 Minutes.

Yo mama is so dirty, when she washes her face, the water comes out muddy.

Yo mama is so stupid, she brought a spoon to the cereal bowl.

Yo mama is so slow, it took her a year to watch 60 Minutes.

Yo mama is so clumsy, she tripped over a text message.

Yo mama is so hairy, when she takes off her shoes, she has to shake out the fur.

Yo mama is so clumsy, when she tried to get a tan, she got a sunburn from the moonlight.

Yo mama is so cool, even the sun wears shades around her.

Yo mama is so tall, Shaq looks up to her.

Yo mama is so forgetful, she put Kool-Aid in her waterbed and drank the mattress.

Yo mama is so nosy, she reads the expiration dates on condoms.

Yo mama is so poor, she waves around a credit card application and calls it a black card.

Yo mama is so dirty, when she takes a bath, the dirt floats.

Yo mama is so stupid, she tried to put a car in park.

Yo mama is so uncoordinated, she tripped over a wireless network.

Yo mama is so short, she poses for selfies under the coffee table.

Yo mama is so short, she pole-vaults over ants for fun.