Yo mama so hairy, she stars in shampoo commercials.

Yo mama so cheap, when someone asked if she wanted to go Dutch, she said 'But I don't even know Dutch!'

Yo mama so lazy, when she went to sign up for a gym membership, they asked for a resume of her previous work outs.

Yo mama so slow, it took her 17 years to watch 60 Minutes.

Yo mama so lazy, when she got a job as a photographer, she just lays around waiting for the negatives to develop.

Yo mama so dumb, she put a ruler under her pillow to see how long she slept.

Yo mama so lazy, when she decided to get a new pet, she got a snail so she wouldn't have to take it for walks.

Yo mama is so short, she break dances under the bed.

Yo mama is so ugly, when she went to the zoo, the elephants threw her peanuts.

Yo mama is so poor, when I went to the trash can, I found her coupon book.

Yo mama is so clumsy, she tripped while standing still.

Yo mama is so hairy, when she wears a bathing suit, it looks like a gorilla in a bikini.

Yo mama is so dirty, even R2-D2 couldn't clean her up.

Yo mama is so greasy, when she walks into a room, she slips on her own shadow.

Yo mama is so ugly, not even a blind man would flirt with her.

Yo mama is so short, she does flips on the trampoline.

Yo mama is so lazy, she doesn't turn off the light because she's too tired to get up.

Yo mama is so dirty, when she went to get a tan, the sun called in sick.

Yo mama is so dumb, she tried to order soup from a barista.

Yo mama is so greasy, her fingerprint unlocks butter containers.

Yo mama is so poor, when I asked her to sign my yearbook, she drew a smiley face.