Yo mama is so hairy, when Bigfoot sees her, he screams and runs away.

Yo mama is so poor, when she goes to the grocery store, they pay her.

Yo mama is so dumb, she thought a linebacker was a credit card.

Yo mama is so old, when she was in school, holidays were called 'not dying yet'.

Yo mama is so old, she remembers Burger King when he was just a prince nugget.

Yo mama is so old, when she was in school, the science books were still being written.

Yo mama is so hairy, when she shaves, the razor begs for mercy.

Yo mama is so lazy, when she won the lottery, she had to hire someone to pick up the check.

Yo mama is so old, she sat behind Moses in the third grade.

Yo mama is so dumb, when she saw a 'Wet Paint' sign, she licked it.

Yo mama is so poor, when she goes to the park, she takes ice cubes for snacks.

Yo mama is so lazy, she thinks a tripod is a workout move.

Yo mama is so clumsy, when she was walking to Walmart, she tripped over Kmart.

Yo mama is so small, she moonlights as a gummy bear.

Yo mama is so slow, when she said her GPS was slow, it replied, 'At your age, what's the rush?'

Yo mama is so greasy, she used bacon as lip balm.

Yo mama is so lazy, she thinks a walk in the park is a marathon.

Yo mama is so old, when she was in school, dodgeball was real.

Yo mama is so hairy, when she gets a haircut, they need a weed whacker.

Yo mama is so dumb, she thought Chili's was a food for snow days.

Yo mama is so poor, she takes the trash in for the garbage man.