Yo mama is so clumsy, she tripped over a flat screen TV.

Yo mama is so hairy, her armpit hair has a landing strip.

Yo mama is so poor, when she goes to the drive-thru, she orders one fry and asks for it on credit.

Yo mama is so short, she broke her leg hopping off the curb.

Yo mama is so lazy, she has to set an alarm to take a nap.

Yo mama is so slow, she was the original sloth.

Yo mama is so short, she does limbo under the bathroom door.

Yo mama is so lazy, she thinks fast food is running to the mailbox.

Yo mama is so slow, when she gets hit by a car, the ambulance shows up fashionably late.

Yo mama is so slow, she watched the movie 'The Quick and the Dead' and asked for a recap.

Yo mama is so short, she plays hopscotch on a Snickers bar.

Yo mama is so old, when she was in school, were two history classes: before her, and after her.

Yo mama is so lazy, she considers standing up exercise.

Yo mama is so fat, her driver's license says 'Picture continued on the other side'.

Yo mama is so slow, it took her 10 days to watch the movie 127 Hours.

Yo mama is so old, she was at the opening of the Ark.

Yo mama is so lazy, she considers blinking as a workout.

Yo mama is so lazy, she has a car with a treadmill in it.

Yo mama is so slow, she watches the Olympics in slow motion.

Yo mama is so poor, she made a shovel out of a spoon and called it 'groundbreaking'.

Yo mama is so lazy, she doesn't workout - she does sit-ins.