Yo mama is so short, she does pull ups on a staple.

Yo mama is so lazy, she doesn't just walk, she name-drops.

Yo mama is so dumb, she sold her car for gas money.

Yo mama is so short, she pole vaults over the curb.

Yo mama is so dumb, she got stabbed in a shoot out.

Yo mama is so hairy, that Bigfoot took a blurry picture of her.

Yo mama is so ugly, when she tried out for The Bachelor, they sent her to Fear Factor.

Yo mama is so old, when she farted, dust flew out.

Yo mama is so hairy, Bigfoot is taking her picture.

Yo mama is so lazy, rather than cooking for Thanksgiving, she took the family to Golden Corral.

Yo mama is so clumsy, she tripped over a penny and busted a lip.

Yo mama is so fat, when she wears a yellow poncho, people yell 'Taxi!'

Yo mama is so old, when she walks into a museum, they turn on the security cameras.

Yo mama is so lazy, she gets a job at the mint and they fired her for not moving.

Yo mama is so dumb, she put a coin in a blender and called it 'Juice'.

Yo mama is so fat, it takes two buses and a train to get to her good side.

Yo mama is so clumsy, she accidentally went into a room full of cats and came out covered in scratches.

Yo mama is so lazy, she applied for a job at an elevator company because she thought it was a 'uplifting' job.

Yo mama is so poor, she took the trash in to get cash.

Yo mama is so clumsy, when she plays Minecraft, she can't even build a dirt house.

Yo mama is so old, when she was in school, history was her favorite subject.