Yo mama is so fat, she puts on her lipstick with a paint roller.

Yo mama is so short, she poses for pictures on a ruler.

Yo mama is so clumsy, she can't even color inside the lines on a coloring book.

Yo mama is so terrible at cooking, she burns water.

Yo mama is so hairy, she starred in a Chewbacca biopic.

Yo mama is so lazy, she doesn’t need a recipe, she eats raw ingredients.

Yo mama is so mean, she has to creep up on bathwater.

Yo mama is so loud, she leaves speaker feedback on silent mode.

Yo mama is so skinny, when she swallowed a meatball, people thought she was pregnant.

Yo mama is so dirty, roaches check in but don't check out.

Yo mama is so short, she orbits the bar stool.

Yo mama is so dumb, she found a spider in her dictionary and thought it was a bug in the system!

Yo mama is so old, when she was in school, the teachers taught dinosaurs how to roar!

Yo mama is so clumsy, she tried to climb Mount Everest and got stuck on the first step!

Yo mama is so hairy, when she visits the zoo, people mistake her for an exhibit!

Yo mama is so dumb, she thought lightning bugs were the cause of global warming!

Yo mama is so old, she knew Yoda when he was still in training!

Yo mama is so old, when she was born, the sun was still a main sequence star!

Yo mama is so lazy, she doesn't jog, she daydreams about jogging!

Yo mama is so hairy, when she gets a haircut, they charge her for two haircuts!

Yo mama is so old, she babysat Shakespeare!