Yo mama is so ugly, the plastic surgeon gave her a group rate.

Yo mama is so bad at cooking, when she makes biscuits, the dog begs for forgiveness.

Yo mama is so greasy, she sweats cooking oil.

Yo mama is so tall, she played hopscotch in the Grand Canyon.

Yo mama is so forgetful, she went to the drive-thru and kept going.

Yo mama is so short, she's a traveling gnome.

Yo mama is so bad at cooking, when she makes spaghetti, she burns the water.

Yo mama is so ugly, she scared the mirror into going on strike.

Yo mama is so poor, when she goes to the drive-in movie, she takes the bus.

Yo mama is so bad at cooking, she burnt the salad.

Yo mama is so skinny, she only went one way to Europe - sideways.

Yo mama is so forgetful, she puts the car keys in the ignition and tries to drive the house.

Yo mama is so short, when she sits on the sidewalk, her feet dangle.

Yo mama is so poor, she drives a convertible air mattress.

Yo mama is so clumsy, she tripped over a Bluetooth connection.

Yo mama is so slow, it took her a week to watch 60 Minutes.

Yo mama is so tall, when she skips church, people think the bell tower fell.

Yo mama is so poor, when I asked her where the remote is, she told me to pretend it's a treasure hunt.

Yo mama is so old, moss grows on her driver's license.

Yo mama is so hairy, when she goes to the hairdresser, they call for backup.

Yo mama is so ugly, she put the 'boo' in 'bootylicious'.