Yo mama is so lazy, she has a mobile desk for work-from-bed days.

Yo mama is so cheap, she waters down hand soap to make it last longer.

Yo mama is so slow, when she walks by a bakery, they close for the day.

Yo mama is so lazy, she doesn't jog, she power naps.

Yo mama is so ugly, when she walks into a room, cats call Pest Control.

Yo mama is so dirty, when she showers, the soap calls for backup.

Yo mama is so cheap, she cuts coupons for free samples.

Yo mama is so slow, it takes her 30 minutes to watch a 15-minute sitcom.

Yo mama is so loud, when she yawns, she registers on the Richter scale.

Yo mama is so ugly, even scarecrows avoid her.

Yo mama is so fat, when she wears a tutu, the neighbors yell 'Encore!'

Yo mama is so dumb, she thought a quarterback was a hunting position.

Yo mama is so lazy, she had a dream about contributing to society.

Yo mama is so fat, when she wears a green shirt, people say 'Don't mow the grass!'

Yo mama is so dumb, she thought a quarterback was a currency exchange.

Yo mama is so short, when she went on a carnival ride, she couldn't reach the height requirement.

Yo mama is so cheap, she recycled a Kleenex.

Yo mama is so loud, she got kicked out of a library for whispering too loudly.

Yo mama is so ugly, when she goes outside, the streetlights turn off.

Yo mama is so fat, when she wears a red shirt, kids shout 'Kool-Aid!'

Yo mama is so lazy, she doesn't butter her bread, she puts it in the toaster and waits for it to pop out buttered.