Yo mama's so ugly, not even a scarecrow will keep her birds away.

Yo mama's so ugly, even Chucky wouldn't play with her.

Yo mama's so short, she poses for Thumbelina.

Yo mama's so hairy, she looks like Chewbacca's little sister.

Yo mama's so clumsy, she gets tangled in her own shoelaces.

Yo mama's so dumb, she brought a spoon to the soup kitchen.

Yo mama's so slow, she needs a sundial to keep track of her day.

Yo mama's so skinny, she uses a toothpick as a pool noodle.

Yo mama's so short, she high-fives Smurfs.

Yo mama's so slow, when she walks, snails pass her.

Yo mama's so dumb, she climbed over a glass wall to see what was on the other side.

Yo mama's so old, when she went to the antique store, they wouldn't let her leave.

Yo mama's so slow, it takes her an hour to watch 60 minutes.

Yo mama's so hairy, she flosses with a jump rope.

Yo mama's so skinny, when she turns sideways, she disappears.

Yo mama's so old, when she went to the museum, she saw her high school photo.

Yo mama's so dumb, she thought the Harlem Shake was a drink.

Yo mama's so skinny, she can dodge a raindrop.

Yo mama's so poor, her welcome mat says 'bye'.

Yo mama's so old, she sat behind Jesus in the third grade.

Yo mama's so hairy, when she went to the zoo, they mistook her for a yeti.