Yo mama is so old, when she sneezes, dust comes out.

Yo mama is so stupid, she brought a spoon to the library because she heard it was 'bookworm season.'

Yo mama is so lazy, she went to a drive-thru at a grocery store.

Yo mama is so clumsy, she walked into an antique shop and the owners panicked.

Yo mama is so old, when she was in school, history was in black and white.

Yo mama is so short, she got her head stuck in a Dorito bag.

Yo mama is so hairy, Bigfoot is her groomer.

Yo mama is so lazy, she sends her alarm clock to snooze for her.

Yo mama is so old, when she was in school, detention was held in a cave.

Yo mama is so dirty, she went to the car wash and they refused to wash her.

Yo mama is so poor, when I asked her for a light, she lit a match and held it under a dollar.

Yo mama is so ugly, the back of her head looks like a moldy potato.

Yo mama is so lazy, when she walks her breasts hit her in the chin.

Yo mama is so old, when I asked her when she was born, she said 'Before dirt.'

Yo mama is so technologically challenged, she thought a motherboard was a cruise ship destination.

Yo mama is so fat, her patronus is a cake.

Yo mama is so short, she poses under a limbo stick.

Yo mama is so short, she needs a ladder to change her mind.

Yo mama is so weak, she can't even hold a grudge.

Yo mama is so fat, her college graduation photo was an aerial shot.

Yo mama is so poor, when I stepped on a dollar bill, she said I was obstructing traffic.