Yo mama is so fat, her high school picture is an aerial photograph.

Yo mama is so short, she has to use a ladder to pick up a Cheerio.

Yo mama is so dumb, she took a spoon to the superbowl.

Yo mama is so ugly, her reflection puked.

Yo mama is so hairy, when she goes to the salon, they have to use a lawn mower.

Yo mama is so short, she makes cookies on a seesaw.

Yo mama is so fat, NASA plan to use her to test gravity.

Yo mama is so lazy, she doesn't lift a finger unless it's to change the channel.

Yo mama is so hairy, when she gets in the bath, the water jumps out.

Yo mama is so ugly, the plastic surgeon filed for bankruptcy after seeing her.

Yo mama is so hairy, when she went camping, Bigfoot took her picture.

Yo mama is so lazy, when she got a light bulb over her head she said 'I've got an idea.'

Yo mama is so old, when she looks in a mirror it reflects back in black and white.

Yo mama is so bald, she doesn't even have eyebrows to express surprise.

Yo mama is so slow, she thinks instant messaging is making a sandwich quickly.

Yo mama is so skinny, when she swallowed a meatball, she looked 8 months pregnant.

Yo mama is so cheap, she unplugs the clock at night to save time.

Yo mama is so bald, I ran my car over her head and got a speeding ticket.

Yo mama is so dumb, she tried to use Instagram to buy a new phone.

Yo mama is so slow, when she jogged past me, she was in yesterday.

Yo mama is so short, she can hang-glide on a postage stamp.