Yo mama is so clumsy, she tripped over a cornflake.

Yo mama is so poor, when I stepped on a rake, she said 'Who's there?'

Yo mama is so short, she poses for trophies in miniature golf.

Yo mama is so slow, she watches the news a week late.

Yo mama is so clumsy, she got tangled in a phone cord.

Yo mama is so slow, it took her 20 minutes to watch 60 Minutes.

Yo mama is so dumb, she put a quarter in the parking meter and waited for a gumball to come out.

Yo mama is so short, she submarine surfs in the bathtub.

Yo mama is so lazy, she thinks a workout is lifting the remote.

Yo mama is so hairy, when she sheds, people mistake her for a carpet.

Yo mama is so slow, she thinks 'quick sand' is a brand of fast food.

Yo mama is so slow, she took a 30-minute survey and it asked for her lunch order.

Yo mama is so short, she makes Tyrion Lannister look like Shaq.

Yo mama is so dumb, she takes her smartphone to the doctor for a flu shot.

Yo mama is so lazy, she's a member of the National Procrastination Society, but hasn't gotten around to attending a meeting yet.

Yo mama is so hairy, when she got a haircut, the stylist lost the scissors.

Yo mama is so slow, she took a snail out for a walk and it passed her.

Yo mama is so hairy, when she shaves, Bigfoot collects her hair.

Yo mama is so clumsy, she got fired from a ping pong tournament.

Yo mama is so short, she uses a toenail clipper to trim her lawn.

Yo mama is so lazy, she quit her job because it was too much sitting.